Sermon PRIDE Sunday, June 23 2024
We live in a time when hate has been given license to be unleased in our
world and country. Just these past two weeks our Facebook account has
been under attack by people who have said the most vile things simply
because we celebrated Juneteenth last Sunday and today are celebrating
PRIDE. However that is not what I am to speak about today. Rather the
purpose of today is to celebrate love in a broader form, love that is
expressed through sexual orientation and gender identity. So, I want to
begin by talking about the difference between these forms of love. The
topic of sexual orientation and gender identity are two very different topics
that interelate.
Sexual orientation refers to our natural attraction to others. This issue
has garnered wide acceptance in our country, and we now have legal same
sex marriage. People are accepting this form of love more readily in recent
years. A great deal of progress has been made since my generation’s time
back in the 1970s and 80s. Today’s first reading happened to be the regular
Old Testament reading for today, is a reading from Hebrew scriptures about
an intense same gender love between young David who would become king
of Israel and Johnathan, the son of the current king Saul. We heard in the
reading from 1 Samuel, “When David had finished speaking to Saul, the
soul of Jonathan was bound to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him
as his own soul. Saul took him that day and would not let him return to his
father’s house. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David, because he
loved him as his own soul.” Then the story continues, Johnathan takes off
his clothes in front of David giving him his armor and sword a sign of trust.
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Johnathan made himself vulnerable before his beloved friend David. I am
not saying this was a sexual act, but an act of total vulnerability, which true
love always is.
When we truly love anyone… we make ourselves vulnerable to them
trusting the deep love we share will be honored and grow. Love of another
is about trust, honoring the person, exposing our most vulnerable parts of
ourselves. In doing so love grows.
In the late 70s and early 80s as AIDS took hold in our country, the
largely gay male community who were affected by AIDS modelled what it
meant to become completely vulnerable and willing to care for one another.
While most of the rest of the country and those in authority simply ignored or
worse demonized people the LGBT community the community modelled
what loved looked like in the face of suffering and death. I think it was the
intense love witnessed by the nation as well as the fact that every single
person knew and loved someone that was LGBT and had a choice to make.
Sadly, for many it meant loss of family and those whom they loved most.
For others of us, the witness and faithfulness modelled something important
and only served to deepen our love of family and friends. I think it was all
these two-phenomenon of people choosing to love those they knew among
their family and friends and AIDS taken together… why sexual orientation
has become less of a hot button issue for most Americans. Currently, Gallup
estimates that a full 71% of all Americans approve of same sex marriage
and unions, up from only 27% in 1996. Huge progress in a short time.
However, gender identity is more complex. I am not completely
knowledgeable but, I will try to explain. Gender identity is the person we
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see ourselves in our own bodies. And, it can be fluid for some people. When
we close our eyes, we have a picture of who we are. In my case I’m very
clear when I close my eyes, I see myself as male.
However often wrestling with issues of gender identity can be very
painful for all involved. I think this is why transgender or non-conforming
gender expressions are causing so much backlash from certain sectors in
our country.
Some simply cannot wrap their head around the idea of gender not
being a black and white. They abhor the idea that gender can be fluid or
has a range of expression. Yet much of life is not black and white but
shades of gray.
So, in short, sexual orientation is love oriented to another
while gender identity is about self-identity and self-love.
Self-love is at the heart of gender identity as is the struggle and pain of
claiming one’s truest sense of self in one’s own skin. And, transgendered
persons or non-binary are simply asking for understanding not judgement,
fear, or anger. Again, it is about love of self.
I believe that those who are most vocal against transgendered or
gender fluid persons do not have a strong sense of self-love. Because if
you really have healthy love of self, then allowing others to experience self-
love and expression would not be an issue. As I have preached before in
this church the commandment “Love your neighbor as yourself, is
something many of us do very well. I think many of us do not love ourselves
all that much. If we had real love of self then love of neighbor no matter
who they are would not be a problem.
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A few years ago, in this very room we hosted a session for about thirty
teens on the topic of sexual orientation and gender identity. I spoke on the
issue of orientation; another young woman spoke about her journey as a
transgender person and a third non-binary person spoke about their journey.
I knew these individuals and the difficult road they travelled. I was especially
struck by what Cody our non-binary guest shared and asked us to do. They
asked us to close our eyes, which I would like you to do right now. So
please close your eyes for a moment.
Now that they are closed, I want you to see the image of yourself as
you see yourself. Hold that image for a while of who you are. PAUSE. Now
open your eyes. How many of you see yourself as male or female when
you close your eyes?
Now imagine, just imagine… what it must feel like for people who do
not see themselves as male or female completely. Gender non-conforming
people have an image of themselves that no one else sees.
Cody said imagine all the people I knew growing up, all my family and
friends and all those I have come to love and who love me that do not see
the image of me that I see when I close my eyes. Cody said imagine how
painful that is when the people you have known the longest and loved most
in the world do not see you as you see yourself. I still remember that to this
day and the intense emotion we felt in this room by all in the room by what
Cody experienced and shared with us. It made it real. So, to close this
topic I want to say it takes great strength and love and self determination to
come to grips with gender identity, or sexual orientation for those who are
not part of the dominant sis-gendered… that is straight culture. Rather than
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demonize, people, all of whom are created in the image of God, we are
called to love. As Christians, the mandate from our Lord and Savior Jesus
Christ is clear. He told his disciples in his very last time with them, “I give
you a new commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”
Jesus did not define it or qualify it, he simply commanded us to do it.
Judgment is for God not for us to pronounce on anyone.
Lastly, I refer to our Epistle reading today from John’s letter to the
churches. Remember, John was the beloved disciple, the one Jesus loved
best. He writes to the churches, “Beloved, let us love one another, because
love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows
God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love. Those
who say, ‘I love God,’ and hate their brothers or sisters, are liars; for those
who do not love a brother or sister whom they have seen, cannot love God
whom they have not seen. The commandment we have from him is this:
those who love God must love their brothers and sisters also.”
All of us need one another to live our fullest lives. So, my challenge for
all of us gathered … will you commit yourselves to speak out for love,
especially when the voices of the world are so vile and hateful right now and
not of God. My friends, never forget the message of Jesus’ final night with
his disciples before he went off to his death for speaking the message of
love and challenging the powers of the world. “I give you a
new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you,
you also should love one another.” Never forget this my friends. Jesus’
new commandment replaces the old law with the law of love. LOVE ONE
ANOTHER. FOR THERE IS NO MORE.